Self Esteem
Why is it that we can feel that our self esteem decreases
as we grow older? When I was around
eight or nine, I made a plaque that said
“Curls are the Best”. I gave it to my
grandmother for Christmas. She had it
hanging in her bedroom for the next 20 or more years. It was a piece of a confident, artsy, spunky
me. When she died I found it among her
things. My first thought was, “This
childish thing…” then I held it and thought, “my grandmother kept this part of
me…” I offered her me for Christmas that
year, just me – and she kept me close to her all those years. I took the plaque and put it up in my bedroom,
by my mirror. When I look at it reminds
me of the essence of me, confident, happy, accepting, ready to go out into the
world, and the future ahead of me. It
also redirects me – away from feeling down, or scared, or nervous about being
just me…from the time the world and experiences have squished me down. I tell myself, “remember that glee of a
little girl, offering just herself and that was enough.” I remember even making that plaque, rolling
out the clay, doodling a face, using a spring to make indents for the crazy,
curly hair and then writing the declaration that curls are the best. I remember wrapping the plaque up and
putting it under the tree. I remember my
grandmother opening it up, and saying it was lovely, she was happy to have a
part of me. I remember her giving it a
special place in her bedroom. Now I have
it, it is a place holder to me, to remember the best of me, that self esteem
and inner joy that I had and still can have.
I am
now in a time in my life where I can
explore what is next in my life, how will I build on my self esteem and inner
joy. How will I find meaningful work and
still offer myself confidently to the world.
The next thing is to take confident steps towards my future. I can only be me, curls and all.
P.S. All hair types are fine, you only need to be
comfortable with yourself, and you are the best you.
Thanks to Melissa for sharing this with us - it did may me smile. Thank you Joye.
ReplyDeleteIt's like a snapshot of the inner you at that age! Cool to have that insight and be able to use it as a stepping stone to rediscovering that part of you.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am slowly coming to terms with the nature of my hair. ;-)